Is it really true that this summer I need to think about booties?

I don’t have an infant crawling around on the floor that is in need of new footware.

According to more than one article, 2013 is the year of the bootie. Short ankle boots, available in hot summer colors. Some are an interesting amalgamation of a sandal and boot, with cuffs around the ankle and toe cleavage spilling out the tips. Some are stilettos, there are quite a few platform booties out there, and a few sport the wedge heel. According to my research, the only common difference between shoes that are known as short boots, and booties is booties are universally more expensive. But I wear flip flops, so maybe I’m missing something.

So I can now cross think about booties off of my must do list for the summer.

Just below booties,  word around town is this season calls for mismatched prints, (“power clashing”) lucite heels, faux, or vegan leather skirts, overalls and  anything orange.

I’m lost.

I don’t think I will ever have the time in the morning to coordinate an outfit that tells the world I’m working a power clash. I think people would simply assume all of my clothes were dirty.

Lucite heels? I’ll stick to flip flops.

Faux or vegan leather skirts might not be so bad. If it wasn’t 95 degrees, and I got aroused by the feel of vegan leather sticking to my thighs.

I always liked overalls. They have lots of pockets, which I appreciate. They are usually blue, which looks nice with my eyes. I had a pair of overalls I wore until they literally disintegrated when I was a teenager. I couldn’t go thru that pain again.

And orange. I don’t really understand orange. Maybe they picked the color orange as this season’s color  because no one ever, ever wore orange before. And if you wear orange this summer, you are telling the world- ” I read fashion magazines. I do what they tell me to do. Even if everyone that sees me has experiences a sudden desire to visit the mall and order a lovely frozen orange julius from someone behind a counter that is wearing exactly the same shirt.,I don’t care. I want to look like a Kardashian.”

I have never really paid attention to fashion trends in the past. But this year, I wanted to make an effort. I don’t want to look like I’m on my way to either a Grateful Dead concert or the gym.

But if that calls for the wearing of booties and jumpsuits, I’m just going to have to wait for next year. Although it’s already July. Which means in a week fall fashion will be splashed everywhere.

I wonder how I’d look in gauchos?